When I first heard that we were going into lockdown, I couldn’t think about anyone else but myself and my family. Yet as I watched West London rapper, Fredo, on his Instagram story last Wednesday, it occurred to me that some people are more ready for this period than others.
Now, I agree with Dave Chapelle – there is no need to worship celebrities – I didn’t start thinking, where is Fredo so I can make sense of all of this. Where is Fredo?!
No, I don’t think that Fredo has those type of answers. However, when I thought about it, I realised that he is extremely well prepared for quarantine.
Netflix and Chill
Last November Fredo switched up his style and dropped the melodic banger, Netflix and Chill.
“She wanna Netflix and chill/I wanna get rich and bill”.
He is a visionary. Plenty of women would love to Netflix and chill with him but due to the outbreak of Covid-19, they’ll have to stay in their houses and watch Disney + instead. This leaves Fredo with more time to get rich from his investments while he bills a spliff.
Maybe he took this perspective because it seems that he has already Netflix and chilled his way into fatherhood, after the birth of his daughter, Tori, which he announced on Instagram. Despite this, I understand that he’s not with the mother of his child so the same “get rich and bill” message still applies.
In addition, when watching the Netflix and Chill video, you can’t help but notice the amount of food featured throughout, making the video more enticing than a bunch of video vixens ever could. It’s safe to say that he eats well although I’m not sure about the current takeaway situation. Nonetheless, if the video is anything to go by, he won’t be getting hungry as he watches Narcos.
Lastly, if you know about Fredo, you know that he stays with a fresh trim. I was wondering about how he was going to cope but it seems that he has the situation patterned. In an Instagram story, his fade was still intact, which is just as well because I can’t imagine him with an afro.
“You never feed the badderz pasta”
This is a similar message to Netflix and Chill but the lockdown period will mean that Fredo won’t need to kick any women out of his house since it is indeed home time.
If you don’t know, Fredo had to tell a woman to leave his apartment at Stormzy’s Ibiza festival, #MERKY Festival, last summer, resulting in some epic memes because of Fredo’s behaviour on Instagram live.
Both the way that he dealt with the woman and the conversation that he had with one of his friends went viral, leading to the popularisation of phrases, like “you never feed the badderz pasta” or “darlin it’s home time” as well as “Fruity Fred”.
However, luckily for Fred, he will no longer have to play the role of primary school teacher, since the badderz will already be at home. No need to send them on their way.
Moreover, he will no longer have to play the role of mother since he can eat all of the pasta for himself. No more stealing from the stew pot badderz, there’s rice at home. Leave Fredo alone.
Lastly, his friends may also stay in their houses, meaning that there will be no further rumours surrounding the rapper’s sexuality. Instead of whispering in his ear mandem, you can call him and whisper in his ear that way instead.
This will allow him more time to roll one while he relaxes in his Palm Angels tracksuit and his own You Never Feed The Badderz Pasta t-shirt.
With everything on lockdown, that means that there will be no more messages of “Warick poosi” graffitied on the wall in Fredo’s area. Unless his opps are builders or other key workers that is. Anyway, he should be safe since the perpetrators didn’t meet him in person as Fredo posted the graffiti on his Snapchat last year.
But on a more serious note, just before lockdown, Fredo was involved in some beef with Kilbourn rapper, C Biz, over accusations that Biz’s jewellery was fake. After Fredo dropped his latest single, Scorpion, he jumped on live to diss him and the jeweller, to which C Biz responded that he would make sure his “area gets quarantined and not for no corona virus”.
Now, this is something quite serious and even though I am making light of some situations, others can’t be joked about.
Fredo also lost one of his close friends recently, Muscle Gotti, so like many of us, the quarantine period could be tough for him as he has a chance to heal.
When I think about UK rap, I think about Fredo. He has it on smash. He provides us with great comedy, girls want to be with him and guys want to be him.
Having said that, he is a human being like everyone else. So, although it would be great to see Fredo wilin’ like fellow UK rapper, Swarmz, I understand that he may be going through it and not want to do that.
It could just be time to focus, take some time out and let the music do the talking, since I hear that he has an album on the way, following the release of Netflic and Chill and Scorpion.
And, if he ever misses Harrods, he can take a ride to Perseus, the designer outlet in GTA IV, since he’s starting to look more and more like CJ.
Anyway, stay safe out here. Well, in there, as it’s lockdown. Stay healthy and listen to Fredo.